"Tell me you're that somebody, tell me your that somebody...."
My eyes bounced back and forth across the screen playing an old Aaliyah music video. With my legs crossed, I sat on the bed lost in YouTube's magical world of music. At that moment, I was subconsciously occupying myself with anything that kept my mind off of the fact that I was a strung out drug addict and I was about to lose custody of my kid in a court battle. Music was a special kind of fix that always seemed to calm my nerves. I love candles, so I lit 3 of them and sat them on the dresser to my right. I sat comforted by the pleasure of my favorite artists and their music videos. The temperature in the room was just right, not too hot, not too cold. My relaxed body sunk into the mattress and my mind sunk into Aaliyah's world of fame. Out of my peripheral vision, to the right, I could see the candles flickering back and forth. Along with the beat of the music, they seemed to add to the comfort of my tattered soul. Time gave me no pressure and I felt like I was free to watch a thousand videos if I wanted to. I made it through quite a few of them before my eyes caught the flame of the middle candle growing taller. I dismissed the oddly looking flame and continued my music search. Suddenly, It grew so much taller than the others that I couldnt resist looking away from the computer screen. As my focus was snatched from Beyonce to the dresser, I realized that my eyes were not playing tricks on me at all! There were definitely three lit candles sitting there and the one in the middle had a flame that was strangely taller and more vibrant. It even danced in the room differently then the others. Certain that my imagination had gone wild, I pulled my attention back to the laptop. I pretended that I didn't notice the difference and tried to search for another video. The flame captivated my attention again! It grew bigger, then shrunk to a small size, bigger, then small again. It did this until I finally looked over and it stood eerily still... it seemed taller than ever! This time, I felt enveloped by the flame and my whole existence seemed different. I could suddenly see clearer, I could actually see everything a bit better than before. My perception of everything had changed and I could see so well that in the midst of the flame , a silhouette of a man appeared before my eyes. I had to recollect my thoughts and assess this situation. I was awake, this was not a dream, and I had been clean off of dope for over a week. I tried to rationalize what was happening but couldn't deny what I was seeing. In the hottest part of the flame stood a man before me. My vision went deeper and I could somehow see the man walking away from me in the other direction. In my mind I thought "this cannot be real". As I sat there and watched, the man walked away, looked over his shoulder and walked back toward me. He walked away again and looked back as if he was trying to see if I was following him, then he walked back to me. He did this a couple times then the last time made my jaw drop. In my mind I heard a voice clearly speak to me. He said " Come, come with me, come on, lets go..... come with me." At that moment everything and nothing made sense all at the same time. I felt like I knew Him but had never met Him before. I knew I had to go where he was taking me. I knew in my heart that nothing would ever be the same again. How could I deny this man? I could feel His desire for me pulling my heart closer. I was falling.... falling in love but unlike I had ever imagined.....
My eyes bounced back and forth across the screen playing an old Aaliyah music video. With my legs crossed, I sat on the bed lost in YouTube's magical world of music. At that moment, I was subconsciously occupying myself with anything that kept my mind off of the fact that I was a strung out drug addict and I was about to lose custody of my kid in a court battle. Music was a special kind of fix that always seemed to calm my nerves. I love candles, so I lit 3 of them and sat them on the dresser to my right. I sat comforted by the pleasure of my favorite artists and their music videos. The temperature in the room was just right, not too hot, not too cold. My relaxed body sunk into the mattress and my mind sunk into Aaliyah's world of fame. Out of my peripheral vision, to the right, I could see the candles flickering back and forth. Along with the beat of the music, they seemed to add to the comfort of my tattered soul. Time gave me no pressure and I felt like I was free to watch a thousand videos if I wanted to. I made it through quite a few of them before my eyes caught the flame of the middle candle growing taller. I dismissed the oddly looking flame and continued my music search. Suddenly, It grew so much taller than the others that I couldnt resist looking away from the computer screen. As my focus was snatched from Beyonce to the dresser, I realized that my eyes were not playing tricks on me at all! There were definitely three lit candles sitting there and the one in the middle had a flame that was strangely taller and more vibrant. It even danced in the room differently then the others. Certain that my imagination had gone wild, I pulled my attention back to the laptop. I pretended that I didn't notice the difference and tried to search for another video. The flame captivated my attention again! It grew bigger, then shrunk to a small size, bigger, then small again. It did this until I finally looked over and it stood eerily still... it seemed taller than ever! This time, I felt enveloped by the flame and my whole existence seemed different. I could suddenly see clearer, I could actually see everything a bit better than before. My perception of everything had changed and I could see so well that in the midst of the flame , a silhouette of a man appeared before my eyes. I had to recollect my thoughts and assess this situation. I was awake, this was not a dream, and I had been clean off of dope for over a week. I tried to rationalize what was happening but couldn't deny what I was seeing. In the hottest part of the flame stood a man before me. My vision went deeper and I could somehow see the man walking away from me in the other direction. In my mind I thought "this cannot be real". As I sat there and watched, the man walked away, looked over his shoulder and walked back toward me. He walked away again and looked back as if he was trying to see if I was following him, then he walked back to me. He did this a couple times then the last time made my jaw drop. In my mind I heard a voice clearly speak to me. He said " Come, come with me, come on, lets go..... come with me." At that moment everything and nothing made sense all at the same time. I felt like I knew Him but had never met Him before. I knew I had to go where he was taking me. I knew in my heart that nothing would ever be the same again. How could I deny this man? I could feel His desire for me pulling my heart closer. I was falling.... falling in love but unlike I had ever imagined.....
